Yayeishev 2008

In our basic Hebrew class this week, we learned that to add an “ee” sound to the end of a word makes it makes it into the first person singular. If it is added to a noun, such the word for book, it becomes “my book.” If it is added to a verb, such as the word to walk, it becomes “I walked.” One of the most interesting uses of this suffix is when it is added to the word “הני.” הני means ‘Behold,’ or ‘Lo.’ When we add the suffix, it becomes “הנני,” which the dictionary translates as “Here I am.”

When Gd calls אברהם! to tell him to kill his son Isaac, Abraham answers “הנני.” And when He calls upon him to not kill his son, he calls אברהם אברהם! And again Abraham answers הנני. 

When Gd first calls to Samuel, he thinks it is his surrogate father, the priest Eli, and he answers הנני. Isaiah has a vision of the Eternal surrounded by angels, and he hears Gd say “Whom shall I send? And who will go for Me?” And Isaiah calls out  שלחני הנני! “Here I am! Send me!” There is a great old time spiritual, a song, called “Here am I, Lord send me.” הנני Here am I.

One of the most interesting uses of the word הנני in the entire Torah happens in our parasha this week. Israel, Joseph’s father, asks Joseph “Are not your brothers herding sheep in Shechem? I will send you to them,” he says.  וַיֹּאמֶר יִשְׂרָאֵל אֶל־יוֹסֵף הֲלוֹא אַחֶיךָ רֹעִים בִּשְׁכֶם לְכָה וְאֶשְׁלָחֲךָ אֲלֵיהֶם And what is Joseph’s reply? וַיֹּאמֶר לוֹ הִנֵּנִי And he said to him ‘ הנני.’

These are the brothers who, we are told three times in the previous nine verses, hate Joseph. They hate him so much that they are not able to say ‘Shalom’ to him. They hate him so much that the first time they see him away from the protection of his father, they will run to kill him. Surely he must have known how they felt about him, what they might do to him. But when his father tells him I will send you to them, he replies הנני.

What does this הנני really mean? When can we use it? I think it has to do with the ups and downs of the Joseph story, the vicissitudes of his life. He is thrown down into a pit, and then brought up, but only to be sold into slavery down in Egypt. A lowly slave, he rises to the top of the household, only to be thrown down into a pit again, a dungeon, when falsely accused of a crime. But he rises to the top of the dungeon as well, and then brought further up to talk to Pharaoh. He then rises to the top of the greatest empire of that era. Down up, down up, down again, and up, and up. 

The story of Joseph is like that old children’s book, Fortunately/Unfortunately. Fortunately, his father loves him. Unfortunately his brothers hate him. Fortunately, he gets to stay home while his brothers are working. Unfortunately, they try to kill him and throw him in a pit. Fortunately, they bring him up. Unfortunately, it is only to sell him into slavery. Fortunately, he becomes the head slave of the house. Unfortunately, he is propositioned by his boss’s wife. Fortunately, he is able to resist. Unfortunately, she accuses him of attacking her, and he is thrown into prison. 

Fortunately, he is able to interpret dreams, and becomes an important figure in the prison. The list goes on.

Joseph, when he finally reconciles with his family, will say that all of the seemingly negative things that happened were part of Gd’s plan. They were all necessary steps in the plan to save the children of Israel from famine, and to make the Jews the rulers over all of Egypt. Wonderful! A wonderful story. Does it apply at all to our own lives?

A house burns down. Someone looses her job. A relationship ends. Are we able to say that this is part of Gd’s plan? Should we say that? I recently read an article by a man who moved in with his son in law to take care of his three grandchildren when his daughter died suddenly of an undiagnosed heart condition. A good friend of the family was in Jerusalem when he heard of the death. He went to the Western Wall and kicked it, cursing Gd in language I cannot repeat from this bimah. A friend of mine, who lost three family members in three years, once told me “If this is part of Gd’s plan, He’s got to come up with a better plan.”

Joseph will die believing that Gd has done wonderful things for the Jewish people. We who are familiar with the story know that the Jews will be enslaved in Egypt. It turns out that it was not such a wonderful thing, to go down to Egypt. The children’s book Fortunately/Unfortunately ends at a wonderful party. The real world goes on, and there are always more things, fortunate and unfortunate.

Will the world, like the book, have a happy ending? Will there be justice and peace, an end to the worship of money and power and the works of our hands? The ancient sages say yes, but they also tell us not to think about it. Worry about your own life now, not about the end of time. Rabbi Yochanan Ben Zakkai said that if you are about to plant a tree and someone tells you that the messiah has come, first plant the tree, and then go to see the messiah.

The secret of living is to be there, to be completely present. Where are you? Here I am. הנני. When something good happens, הנני. When something bad happens, הנני. 

Joseph went down to Egypt as a slave, but his brothers went down in triumph. Unfortunately, we were enslaved again, but fortunately, Gd brought us out of slavery with a mighty hand and an outstretched arm. We ourselves were slaves in Egypt. הנני. We ourselves were freed, and stood at Sinai amidst smoke and thunder and the awesome Voice. הנני. We are there also, at the redemption which has not yet come. No less importantly, we are here today, in this cathedral of time. Shabbat has called, and we have answered. הנני. Just that is a miracle. Behold. Here I am.

My prayer for us is that we will have the ability to be present whatever life brings us. Whether we are faced with events wonderful or terrible, may we be able to say “הנני.”